The Tale of Tomaki (Chapter 2)

“FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!”

The chants like a sacred mantra fueled the fire in my gut. It was intense…it was right. My fists opened and closed in anticipation and my tail twitched excitedly. My legs were spread, ready to dodge and kick. My right hand was pulled back close to my chin and my left arm was extended outward with both hands tightened into my ultimate weapons. My hair, wild and untamed as ever blew slightly across my forehead and eyes as wind blew past. Before me stood Jackson. My foe.
“You ready to go down, monkey ass?” Jackson guffawed. “Glad you have that tail, it makes a nice target.” My eyes narrowed and my teeth were bared. His stupid mouth…that stupid, babbling, insensitive mouth of his. Always running. Always looking for someone to mock. Couldn’t he just zip it shut for one damn moment!? It was his mouth that brought us to this point. The playground behind the school was meant for the elementary schoolers, but now it was the battle ground for Jackson and I. We were both 16. We were both around the same height. He had blonde hair and I had dark brown. His eyes were blue and mine were green. My body was toned and fit, he was barely able to buckle his belt. And yet, of all of our similarties and differences, he chooses my tail to insult.
Now all of the high school students and my peers were outside on this dusty playground, waiting for us to exchange blows. The roar of their chanting echoed around me, and I had to restrain myself from grinning. A fight…a real battle…how rarely did I get to experience this joy!?

“I’ll give you one last chance to take back those annoying insults.” I growled. “Apologize and I’ll stop this right now.”
“Apologize for what, Tomaki!?” Jackson mocked. “For telling it like it is? I think you’re scared.”
“No…just being polite. In all honesty, I was hoping you’d decline.” I sneered. “That means I can do this without any regrets!” I charged him and before he could even comprehend what I was doing, I’d struck him hard in the chin. He fell back with a dazed look in his eyes like when you lose your footing without realizing it. He was stunned, and I pressed the attack. My fist connecting…the blood from his mouth…it felt GREAT!
I struck him again, and in the chest this time. When he bent over to grab his broken rib, I kicked him hard in the cheek, sending him sprawling to the dirt. It was pathetic. He struggled to get to his feet but I was already on top of him.
“YOU LOSER!” I roared at him. “HOW DARE YOU MOCK MY TAIL! IT’S THE MARK OF WHAT I AM! I AM A SAIYAN! I AM A WARRIOR! WHAT WOULD YOU KNOW OF MY WARRIOR HERITAGE!?” In truth, my pride over my tail was not why I was angry…it was his weakness. I longed for a true challenge. I longed to discover my true potential. I felt so empty. So alone. What was I lacking?

“TOMAKI YOU STOP IT RIGHT NOW!”

My fist stopped and I spun to see a woman walking up to me. Her eyes were angry and her arms were crossed. I hated when Belle looked at me like that…it always made me feel so guilty. I growled and stood up, getting off of the sniffing and whimpering Jackson.
“Apologize to him!”
“Beeelle…”
“Right now, Tomaki.” She ordered. I turned and rolled my eyes.
“Sorry…asshole.” I then marched past her, leaving the crowd of disappointed and whispering students behind me. Belle followed after me, shaking her head and leading me towards the car. She had come to pick me up…and I knew that I was about to get an earful of a lecture.
Belle had changed little since when I was a child. She still had the same hair, though she now wore it in a pony tail more often. She had taken to smoking, but that was just from the stress of her work, and she didn’t do it often. She had added two new tattoos on her arm, one was of a rose and the other of a cross. The rose vine was wrapped around the top of the cross like a crown of thorns. She also had a small scar on her shoulder.
Two years ago, I discovered my hidden ability to use ki; the inner energy that all beings possess. I could harness it and release it into energy blasts. This was a skill all Saiyans could do, and one day while in an intense training session, I got excited and fired a ki blast into her shoulder. It had left a long gash in her shoulder…but she never stopped smiling, despite my apologies and my concern. She was proud of me for it. Though I doubted she was as proud now.

“Honestly Tomaki…this is the 4th fight this month!”
“5th actually if you count that one wi-”
“Oh would you shut up?” Belle snapped angrily. “You should show more self control than this!”
“I’m trying, alright?” I argued. “It’s not so easy…it’s in my blood okay!?”
“Yeah…yeah I know that.” She muttered, rubbing her shoulder absentmindedly. “Tomaki, have you given any thought at all to-”
“I already told you no.”
“Won’t you just think about it?”
“It’s a waste of time, Belle.” I grumbled. She was talking to me about the same old thing again. I was tired of it.
Far on the outskirts of our town was a special dojo, hidden in the trees. The owner was a man named Hayate. He was an old friend of Belle who had come to visit once or twice. He was a master martial artist, and Belle thought that maybe I could go and train with him…learn to control my violent tendencies. It’s a nice sentiment and all, but what’s the point? I don’t want to repress my fighting instincts, I want to learn to HARNESS them! I want to push them further and further! I want to FIGHT not hold back.
“I talked to Hayate the other day and he says that he’d love to at least just see what you can do. Why not just give it a shot?”
“Maybe if I have time.” I answered gruffly. I didn’t mean a word of it though. I just didn’t see the use. I was glaring out the window of the moving car, watching as the other cars, trees, and buildings just passed me by.
“Ugh, Tomaki…” She fell silent. I didn’t look at her. I didn’t want to admit how I felt. My feelings? Guilt. I shouldn’t feel guilty, and yet when she would speak with that tone…look at me in that way….it made me feel so guilty in myself and my actions. And it also sparked my fury. It made me angry to be guilty.
“What’s the big deal, Belle?!” I snapped.
“The big deal is that these fights are becoming too frequent! If I hadn’t stepped in you might have-”
“What!? KILLED HIM!?” I shouted.
“…That’s not what I said, Tomaki.” Belle grumbled.
“It’s what you were thinking though…” I hissed.

Killing. It’s what we Saiyans were born to do. Our entire existence was about dominating and destroying. I was sent to this planet to do just that…and yet I had no desire too. Despite the fact I had all the means to do so. I had the strength, the power, and the fighting instinct to destroy any normal human…I just didn’t want to. It didn’t appeal to me. To merely fight was enough for me.
But it was the fear of me going too far and killing someone; that was what Belle feared most. She constantly begged me to train with Hayate so I could control myself…so I wouldn’t kill anyone. But no one was dead yet, and I didn’t want to kill anyone, so why worry? I knew when to quit.
“Tomaki, you can’t keep doing this.” Belle ordered as we pulled back up to the house. She got out of the car and I climbed out as well, slamming the door behind me. “Sooner or later you’ll make a mistake.”
“I’m not a thug, Belle!”
“Have you seen what you do to people you fight!?”
“They get what they deserve!” I snarled.
“Oh? And what did this one do? Look at you funny? Call you a bad word? You keep calling yourself a warrior, so start showing some thick skin!”
“It’s not about the insults, Belle. It’s about…”
“The fight.” Belle finished. “It’s that damn Saiyan blood of yours…which is why it’s imperative that you learn some self control. I know you have a desire for combat, but that doesn’t mean you should pursue them!”
“I’ll figure it out!” I growled, walking into the kitchen with her hot on my tail. I heard her slam her hand down on the kitchen table to get my attention, so I spun to face her.
“And how many more have to be HOSPITALIZED before you do!? Take some responsibility for your actions!”
“STOP TALKING TO ME LIKE I’M A CHILD!” I roared back.
“YOU’RE MY CHILD!” Belle screamed.

The entire kitchen went dead quiet as her words seemed to stop time itself. We stared at each other…shock in our expressions. Though I couldn’t see my face, I could tell from her own eyes that I was staring in stunned amazement. Never had Belle ever said that before. She’d never called me her child before…or referred to me as family. I felt an odd feeling in my stomach…a guilty feeling again. I’d never called Belle my mother before, just as she’d never referred to me as a son before. Certainly, when I was enrolled in school, Belle signed all of the paperwork as my guardian, but she’d never addressed me as a child of her own. Did she really feel like I was?
“What did you say?” I asked.
“…It’s nothing…just forget about it.” Belle muttered darkly. “If you think you an control your temper and your violence…then you certainly are capable.”
“Belle…”
“No. You’re right, Tomaki. You’re not a child anymore.” She stated plainly. Breathing in deeply and speaking softly. “I shouldn’t talk down to you…you can make your own choices.”
“No, Belle you called me your ch-”
“I need to go to the store.” Belle cut in. “I’ve got to pick up some things for dinner tonight. Why don’t you stay here and work on your homework…I need to get some fresh air anyway.” I watched her grab her keys and hurry to the door.
“Belle…I’m sorry for-”
“Don’t say it Tomaki.” She whispered darkly. “I know what you’re going to say…but you have your pride as a Saiyan, right? It’s how this whole thing started. I thought I could fix it…I thought I could shape you into something better than just a violent fighter. But I can see that’s all you want to be. I hoped…you could be more. I’m the one who’s sorry, Tomaki. It’s my fault.” With that she walked out and closed the door, leaving me standing stupidly in the kitchen…drowning in my own guilt and aching stomach. I fell down on the chair behind me and glared at my hands…my dirty, bloody hands from my fight with Jackson. She’d seen them and felt ashamed. My words had cut her deeply. Her own words had revealed more than she was prepared to share. It all was crashing so fast.

“Damn it….DAMN IT!” I roared. I hated this feeling of guilt and anger. I hated when I felt this way. I wanted to talk to her…to bring reason back and restore the balance to the way things were. I could fight every man on earth, but to fight with Belle. How could I fight her? She wasn’t like other men…she wasn’t like other people. I cared about her…I didn’t want to hurt her. Not like this.
And yet…this desire to spare her the pain of my wrath was always won over by my Saiyan pride.
“Where it all begins.” I hissed to myself. I slammed my fist against the wall, leaving an impressive dent in the wall.
“Damn it…I’m such an idiot…”