literature

Raised Again (Chapter 13)

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I think that I was finally starting to accept my situation for what it was. Oh, I still wasn’t happy about it. I was still never a fan of having my diaper changed. I still hated the fact that I was just a ball of sensitivity and reflex. I still hated that I couldn’t speak or communicate my feelings about something, so there was a lot to hate. At the same time though…I think that I was finally coming to just fit into the mold. I could stomach the milk that was suckled down my throat, and I had gotten used to being bathed in a tub with Rachel. These things didn’t bother me anymore.
To be honest…there were some things I was actually coming to appreciate. The way Rachel held me…comforted me…treated me…it was actually very sweet. I hadn’t felt so loved in a long time, not even by my own parents. When she would run her fingers through my hair and hold me close…I felt warm and comfortable. It was still kind of embarrassing, and I’d be lying if I said that it was totally cool with me…but I kind of was starting to like being babied. Well…not even that. I didn’t enjoy being babied. I enjoyed being loved. It was the first time in a long time that I felt genuine love. I knew that Rachel wouldn’t let anything happen to me until this curse was lifted…and I believed her. I felt like I could trust her at last.
Despite this though, I still wanted to be my normal age again. I knew Rachel wanted that too, of course…but for me it was a necessity. Every day, Rachel would take me to the calendar and show me how many days we had left until the day of the assignment…the day I would turn back hopefully. We were nearing the final two weeks…and I was excited, and yet…also a little worried. Two great worries burdened themselves in my mind. The first being would I turn back? What if this was permanent?! I don’t think I could stand life as a baby. The second fear I had was, when I did turn back…what would that mean for Rachel and I? What would change between us after something like this? I figured I’d save those fears for later…I had more important things to worry about…

“Good morning, baby.” I looked up from my crib to see Rachel smiling down at me. It had been two days since I’d been fed from Rachel’s breasts…and since that day things had been slightly different between us. It was a common understanding: We had to put our dignity and pride aside for each other’s sake. I couldn’t afford to keep picking fights about what I was made to do, and Rachel couldn’t hold back from her motherly duties.
“Good morning.”
“You hungry today?” She asked. My stomach growled and that was all the response she needed. She reached down and lifted me out of the crib. She set me in her lap and pulled out a bottle of warm milk, holding it to my mouth. I didn’t hesitate but wrapped my mouth around it and suckled it obediently. I wasn’t going to give Rachel any fuss today…especially after what had happened the other night. I suckled on the nipple bottle and drank down every drop. “Wow, you really were hungry.” She pulled away the bottle and giggled. “Did you like it?”
“I prefer eggs.”
She lifted me to her shoulder and patted my back until I burped, which took only a few seconds. She kissed my nose and bounced me in her hands. I squealed in a mixture of joy and fear that she’d drop me. She smiled and rubbed my head, resting me against her chest.
“James, I hope you’re not mad at me…”
“What good would being mad do me?”
“I just want to put this all behind us…so thank you for being so cooperative.”
“No point in struggling anymore, so do your worst.” Even as I thought the line, I instantly knew that I’d regret it.

Rachel wrapped me up in the blanket I had been sleeping in and walked downstairs with me. She sat down on the couch and bounced me gently in her lap. I giggled despite myself from the feeling of being played with. She kept her hands on my sides and tickled me from time to time, causing me to squeal and squirm like a worm on a hook. It was embarrassing…but I couldn’t be too upset about it. After all, it was just harmless fun. We had the house to ourselves, and I didn’t feel like people were watching me continuously. I could just relax and let things roll.
“Is there anything you’d like to do?” Rachel asked.
“How about chess…even as a baby I’d whoop your butt.”
“How about a movie?”
“S’matter!? You ‘fraid I’d dominate ya in chess!?”
“How about ‘The Little Mermaid?’”
“Eh…that works too I guess.”
Rachel put the movie into the tv and she lay a blanket out on the floor, setting me down in the middle. I stared up at her questioningly and she just gave me a small smile. “Mom said that this would be a good way to help you feel a bit more free. You can play around on the floor and not feel helpless.”
“Have I ever mentioned I love your mom!?” I let out a loud laugh of joy and began rolling around and crawling on the blanket. I tried to push myself up onto my feet, but my arms began to tremble from the strain and I just crashed back down on my cushioned diapered butt.
“Careful, baby.” Rachel giggled. I placed my hands firmly on the ground again and sighed. I couldn’t walk…I didn’t have the motor skills for that. However, if I focused, I could probably crawl a yard or two. I shuffled my knees and worked my hands furiously as I crawled from one end of the blanket to the other. I could hear Rachel ‘awwing’ and cooing at me from the couch, but I ignored her. For the first time, I was moving on my own, and I was more than happy to get this moment of blissful freedom!
I crawled to the edge of the blanket and I could hear the movie starting. Rachel knelt down next to me and watched me as I attempted to crawl onto the carpet floor. Before I could make it, I felt her hands scoop me up and plant me back on the blanket. “Sorry, James…the carpet is too rough and it’ll rub your knees raw.”
“Darn it…then I’m limited to the freaking blanket!?” I felt the hiccups starting and slowly I began to cry gently, as if upset. Rachel sat down on the blanket and took me up in her arms, pulling me to her lap and holding me close.
“I’m sorry, James…I know you must be disappointed.”
“It’s okay…I just got my hopes up, that’s all.”
“Tell you what, how about I go get you some toys to play with?” Rachel set me back on the blanket and ran off into another room. I watched her go and then turned my attention to the TV. The movie was playing and they were singing one of the songs already. I watched for a few moments before I heard Rachel returning. She had a large box in her hands and when she tipped it over a bunch of small blocks fell out. The blocks had english letters on them.
“We used to use these when we were first learning the english language. It’s kind of silly, but since your first language is english, they should be just fine for you.” Yes, indeed my first language was english…but I could understand most Korean well enough. I smiled as I realized that Rachel was putting my interests first and I crawled to the blocks. “So do you like them?” I giggled and looked at the blocks. I decided to mess with her a little and I spelled out my response.

“Y.E.S.” Rachel suddenly gasped at this and dropped down on her knees.
“James, you can still spell! You can still spell out words!” I stared at her and then down at the blocks again and squealed in surprise. I hadn’t even realized it at first because spelling was such second nature to me…but she was right! I could still spell out words and I was able to do that with the blocks! We might be able to communicate! “James, try spelling my name!” I went to work instantly and searched for the blocks I needed, making small grunting and crying sounds as I stretched and arranged the letters until I finally had what I wanted.
“R.A.C.H.E.L.” I spelled it out. Rachel laughed and clapped her hands.
“James, we can finally communicate with each other! We just have to use these blocks! I’ll run and go get some more! I think there’s another set in the attic.” Without a second of hesitation she took off upstairs to the attic. I sat down and stared at the blocks, pleased with myself. For once…just once…something had gone right. I could communicate with her now. How long that would last, I didn’t know, but I did know that I was finally a step closer to freedom. I giggled and began to rearrange the blocks to make a message when she returned. However, I felt a very familiar feeling and I winced, knowing what was happening in my diaper.

“Aw crap.”

Rachel came back down with a box and set it down infront of me and dumped out the blocks. I looked away in embarrassment and she smelled me. She backed off a little with a wrinkled nose and giggled. “Oh James…did you do what I think you did?!”
“Take a wild guess.”
“Well, we’ll get back to the blocks later…I need to change a stinky boy.” She reached down and carefully picked me up, taking me to the kitchen. She laid me down and undid my diaper. She smiled at me. “James, I’m so glad that we can finally communicate now! I mean…this is awesome!”
“Yeah, I know! Things are finally starting to improve!”
She removed the diaper and tossed it. She then grabbed a wet disinfectant wipe and lifted my little legs. She quickly wiped my tiny butt and little boy parts before dispensing that to. I just looked away and winced. I kept telling myself that it would all be over soon and tried not to focus on her…but it wasn’t an easy thing to do. After she was done, she powdered my butt and groin and quickly replaced the diaper on my body.
“There, all nice and fresh.” Rachel leaned forward and kissed my stomach, causing me to burst into fits of giggles. She then carried me back into the den and set me on the blanket again. I got down on my butt and began arranging the blocks once again. Soon I had spelled out my message.
“N.O.T.-.F.U.N.”
“I know, baby…I know. But you know that I have to.” She sat down next to me and she wrapped her soft and warm hands around me, pulling me up against her and she begin to nuzzle and coddle me. I squirmed a little but soon allowed her to. She looked down at me and grinned. “James…I’m…I’m kind of glad that we got to spend a month like this.”
“WHAT!?”
“It’s just…I feel like we’ve gotten to know each other a lot more. We’ve gotten to share more with each other than ever before, and well…I still want you back to normal and everything but, I think that we’ve grown closer as friends thanks to this.” I looked up at her and buried my head in her chest. She lowered me down to the blocks. “What do you think?” She asked. She wanted me to spell out a response to her. I reached out and began to arrange the blocks into a word. I began to wonder how I felt about what she had said. I wondered if she really meant it…and if I could possibly be feeling the same way. I remembered all that we had been through together and I couldn’t help but frown, thinking about how horrible it had been…how humiliated I had been and how it had hurt at times. But then…I remembered how Rachel had been there for me and not once ever left me alone. She was sacrificing so much for me. It was true, we had grown closer.
“I.-.A.G.R.E.E”
Rachel teared up and quickly pulled me back into her again, pressing my little body up against her chest as she kissed the top of my head. “Oh, James…thank you. I hope I’ve been a good mommy to you. I promise that this’ll all be better when you’re normal again.”
“Yeah, you have been a good mommy, Rachel…for what it’s worth…You’ve been really good to me, and I…I want to be normal again, obviously but…I’m not upset anymore. I think I can make it the last few weeks.”
It's odd...everyone kept asking me if I would "write a part 2" of Raised Again. I was confused by this request because...I'm not done yet guys. There's still a few more things I want to do with this story, and there are things that Doyeun (:icondy1231:) wanted to see done with this. She's the one who requested this story and asked me to write it, so it won't end until she's satisfied. Hahaha! 

Anyway, about this chapter. This took longer to write than I would have liked. Ever since I got writers block, writing has been more and more of a struggle. I'm hoping that it goes away after a while. In this chapter, James finally makes a breakthrough in his attempt to find some way of communication with Rachel. Will this last? Well, I guess we'll see. Hahaha!

Hope you all enjoy!

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KaiseroftheSwarms's avatar
This was an interesting development!